I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.
I think I’ve always despised doing the typical things of kids my age. I didn’t go to a club until was 18, I never pretended to be older than I was, and I played with dolls even when I was 14. I had friends younger than me, and I enjoyed spending time with them, inventing and narrating tales. I also loved spending time with myself, laying on my grandparents’ huge bed and reading on hot summer afternoons. I loved sewing (my grandma taught me to do pretty flowers and I also sewed mini dresses for my dolls). When I grew up, I spent my afternoons after class alone in my room, watching films, reading and writing. I invented stories, read every magazine in sight and listened to music. I’ve never been afraid of spending time alone -well, except at nights when my dad decided to go out and left me alone until midnigh: that terrified me.
What I mean with all this rambling is that spending time alone is very healthy. I learned what I liked, what I disliked and that I can actually have fun alone. It’s not that I don’t love being with those I like –my friends always cheer me up and I love being with them doing whatever– but I also love being alone. Spending time with myself has taught me that I probably wouldn’t need anyone else to “validate” my life or give meaning to my time. I’m totally capable of having fun alone.
That’s why I’ve always disliked the thought of a girl needing a boyfriend. No, thanks. I can do things by myself. Give me the dvd of John Hughes’ “Pretty in Pink”, chocolate and iced tea and I’ll have a perfect evening by myself.
I’ve been thinking of my social skills -which are pretty deplorable. It’s almost as if I had a “social battery” that slowly runs out when I spend too much time with people around me. I get to be around people, yeah, but I need to go home after a while to recharge that social battery. I need to shut the doors, turn on my favorite song and lose myself in my unimportant thoughts.
Then, being alone is not so bad. You should all try it.